01. Truth Hurts But Lies Worse
Steve Jobs’s parents were very open with him about his adoption in his early age. As the saying goes, Truth builds relationships.
As design thinking says, It is not about us, It’s about them, the Users.
Parents may think they are protecting the child, but the truth is they were trying to protect themselves from the fear of loss. So, when Paul Jobs and his wife came forward, to tell the truth, It was not about the parent, it’s about the child.
Children are going to look at parents as their role models. Paul Jobs, by being honest and truthful, played a perfect role model. There will always be trust and closeness when everyone in the family count on each other to tell the truth even in difficult situations.
You may not be lying, but hiding a truth by not telling is also a lie.
Lies of omission can have ramifications as ravaging as “real” lies
By telling the truth, they let Steve Jobs to process it and come out more confident and independent.
02. SELF ESTEEM
“So does that mean that your real parents didn’t want you?” when the girl asked, Steve jobs ran into the house crying.
And his parents, with a SERIOUS look, looking STRAIGHT into his eyes, “We SPECIFICALLY PICKED YOU OUT”. They repeated it slowly again, emphasizing on every word.
How do you talk to words in an emotional moment? How to provide them confidence? How do you make them feel special?
Serious Face, Body language, Looking straight into eyes, Simple sentence, slow talk, emphasis on each word.
“The CHOSEN Kid”
Paul Jobs and his wife made Steve Jobs to feel Special. Not just by words, but their actions too.
“Picked Out” — Chosen — Feel Valued — Improves confidence — Feel good about themselves — Prepared to meet everyday challenges.
Safe Environment — “Steve, this is your workbench now”, Paul Jobs said as he marked off a section of the table in their garage. Paul Jobs provided a safe home environment for Steve to explore, imagine and improve his creativity.
When we work in front of them, children like to explore and would like to join. When we are sketching, they come, ask for paper, pen and start drawing.
Curiosity —To make a child independent, he needs to explore. To make him explore, we have to nurture curiosity in his mind. To nurture curiosity, we need to provide him knowledge.
When we are working along with children, teach them what we are doing, why we are doing, what are our learnings, and show them how we are doing. Once they engage them, they will learn a lot. The same principles will help them in other situations and their rational thought process will grow faster.
“He knew how to build anything from cabinet to fence. He would explain to me how to do, and gave me a hammer to work with him. He taught me how to craft the back of cabinets, fences though they were hidden from our eyes. He loved doing this right and cared about the look of the parts you couldn’t see” -steve jobs. (Beginning of appreciation of aesthetics?)
“He was working for a company that made lasers for electronics and medical products. As a machinist, he crafted the prototypes of products for engineers, and he was fascinated by the need for perfection. He would say “Lasers require precision alignment.They want it out of one piece of metal so that coefficients of expansion are all the same” – Steve Jobs.
In-depth knowledge will encourage them to question more and seek similar knowledge in other situations too.
Observation — You see what others don’t see. You may see the forest, but I see them as trees. Observation of details — an essential skill needed for a child to be creative, affectionate. Any product’s success is in details.
“My father would point out detailing of the design in his car, the lines, the chrome, the vents, the trim of the seats” — Steve jobs.
When you work with the children, do you point out finer details to your children? If you have a flying minion flying, do you explain how the rotor works? Do you point out any intricate detail, which is not obvious? When you repair a toy piano, do you explain where the battery is, why there is a battery cover, how the locking happens? Your kids will sense your fascination even if they can’t fully understand the topic and slowly it will get reflected.